Hi Alan,
I am thrilled to hear your speed has improved somewhat. This is potentially very useful information, so thanks for posting it.
... I still don't consider myself skilled enough to manage it ...
It can be a bit of a learning curve but I'd say it's worth it. It's not that difficult to manage cPanel/WHM through their GUI interface and most server providers will assist you with managing your server to keep you as a client.
There are also a ton of forums around the internet that can help you with the basics of setting up and managing your server. Try
forums.cpanel.net. This decision is, of course, entirely up to you!
I haven't seen anything other than CPanel that will redirect incoming emails to the processing scripts directly from the interface.
I have found this, too, although I do recommend and work mostly with Plesk-based servers where these entries must be made via root SSH shell. cPanel IS the only common panel that allows CGI redirection via the client hosting control panel.
Regards